Letter To Kim

This is a letter I wrote to Kim that I figured could double as a blog entry.


Well my friends it is time for another Ukraine update.

The Ukrainian government has issued the following statement in preparation for the upcoming European Cup:



"A unique oracle hog, a real Ukrainian pig and a psychic that knows the mysteries of football," astatement said. "Every day at 4 p.m. it will predict the result of theupcoming match."

I’m sure you are thinking the exactsame thing as me, what is the pig’s name? Psychic animals are usually named. Paul the German Octopus was the most famous of animal oracles.

He correctly divined the outcome of all 7 of Germany’s games in the 2010 World Cup and the final match between Spain and Netherlands.   The mollusk was clearly gifted with second sight because the odds of guessing all 8 games correctly is 256 to 1.

Don’t feel too bad for the Ukranian pig if it answers incorrectly.  Not all psychic animals have had the same track record.   Magdalena the two headed tortoise with two brains was fairly successful predicting Slovenia’s hockey games but received little acclaim due to her habit of choosing the clear favorites.

Heidi the Cross-eyed opossum while easily the funniest one to look at only had a 67% success rate of picking the Oscar winners.  Seriously she looks hilarious.

That’s the good news.  The bad news is I’m a little bit afraid thatI’m going to be fired.  There have been some subtle hints and my office manager has had me show her how to do different parts of my job.  You see the Nevada Legislature passed a new law that has made my job temporarily obsolete.  It is unclear if what I mainly do is going to start up again.  That means my work load has dropped and so has company revenue. Since then I’ve mostly done paralegal work but since I’m not really a paralegal I ask as many questions as I get work done.  We’ll see. I might be worrying for nothing. 

The above mentioned scenario has had me keeping an eye on job postings for accounting students.  90% are in casinos.  Do any of you have strong opinions about whether or not it would be a conflict of interest to run numbers at a casino?  I’m leaning towards not a conflict.  I mean casinos have movie theaters, shows, restaurants, accommodations as well as gambling.  It’s not like I had to quit working at the shoppette just because we sold cigarettes there.  Although the church encourages its members not to gamble it is not declared outright to be evil like word of wisdom stuff.  Let me know if you have strong thoughts.

Anyway I’m coming up with great sobs tories to slip in casually at work conversations so that they’ll feel too bad to let me go.  You see if they have to fire someone I’m the obvious choice.   I’m the only one in the office without a car payment much less a house payment.  Luckily Hilary’s car is in a funk and the repair shop can’t fix it.  I’ll try to milk that for all it’s worth. 

I’ve taught Primary for the last time.  I’ve been replaced.  I’ll get to go to Elders Quorum.  It’ll probably be my 4th or 5th time in EQ since moving into the ward.   But not this Sunday.  Today(Thursday) we will drive up to Utah to chill out with the fam.  I think we’re going to rock out to Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites on  the drive up. Usually on these three day weekends I forget to write you Kim but not this week.